


Sleeplessness ||

by Akitadivine



Category: Minecraft (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Author Is Sleep Deprived, Childhood Trauma, Depressed TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), How Do I Tag, Hurt TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Long-Distance Friendship, Mentioned Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Mentioned Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Mentioned Wilbur Soot, Past Child Abuse, Past Rape/Non-con, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Protective Wilbur Soot, Scared TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Self-Insert, Suicide, Suicide Attempt, Toby Smith | Tubbo Has PTSD, Toby Smith | Tubbo Misses TommyInnit, Toby Smith | Tubbo is Not Okay, TommyInnit Angst (Video Blogging RPF), TommyInnit Has PTSD (Video Blogging RPF), Trauma, Traumatized Tommyinnit (Video Blogging RPF), Tubbo is a kid, dad Philza watson, dream is a sleep paralysis demon, george is also a sleep paralysis demon, phil is adult, philza Watson is a dad, ranboo is a kid, ranboo still has memory loss, techno is a kid, tecnoblade is comfort, tommyinnit Is a kid, wilbur is a kid
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-22
Updated: 2021-02-22
Packaged: 2021-03-14 13:02:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,900
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28921023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Akitadivine/pseuds/Akitadivine
Summary: Please please for god dont atack me this is a self insert :’) i will take this down if the cc said they aren’t comftarble with it please do not tell me to get help i have helpThere are no ships ya nasties 🤺🤺PLEASE READ TRIGGER WARNINGS!!!!!Tommy has rough child :( ((pog thru the pain mate))And has been to multiple houses finally he finds one that might be safe? (( it is. ))Philza adopts Tommy as his 3rd child next to Wilbur and Techno Tommy
Comments: 12
Kudos: 57





	1. A realm of dreams and nightmares

**Author's Note:**

> Hello ! Please do not atack me please be calm if the cc has said they aren’t comftarble with it , i WILL take it down if they said they where uncomftarble with it , this is a self insert might be a vent? I need sleep and uhhh trigger warnings i will warn you about them !
> 
> Again please do not atack me :) i hope you’ll like this if you dont well no problem i atleast hope you have a great day!
> 
> TRIGGER WARNINGS  
> ///////////////////////
> 
> Self harm   
> Trauma  
> Past rape / recovery also  
> Vomiting   
> Suicide  
> Child abuse mentions  
> Sleep paralysis   
> Stimming  
> Tic syndrome

vent/self insert

Tommy had false hope , his usually ocean blue eyes now almost as grey as the blanket he was holding his fingers glided over the soft piece of cloth ` _soft_ ` he thought to himself as a hand was rested on his shoulder , Thomas would usually flinch but he was silent “ Tomster “ a cheery voice sounded behind him , he  hated it it felt like false hope something that Tommy has felt so many times , “ yes? “ he turned to the man as he clenched the blanket he swiped the hand of his shoulder before looking the man straight in his eyes “ whats with the frown? , let put that upside down!” The young adult shot finger guns at the child ,  `idiot ` Tommy smilled as he pointed them back “ davinky! , how are you?” Tommy joked his smile turning a bit crooked a weird sensation fell over him , something he hadn’t in a long time “ good how about you ? , get in the car we gotta go back “ the man called Dave opened the door for Tom , Tommy let out a slight sound before stepping into the car “ good , just got kicked out of a house for the 2nd time “ Tommy joked trying to hold back a sob , his eyes where the red but he sure as well would have cried if he didnt hold it back , it was silent he hated it it crept into his head , his hands move to his hair lightly tugging it , he put on his hood as he grabbed the blanket  `he still smells like the first time` Tommy admitted to loving the scent of pomegranates something about how they scented sweet , Tommy didnt like how they tasted but he loved how they smelled ,  ` i wonder how tub-` his own thoughts where cut off as he was almost slammed against the seat infront of him , he grasped at the collar of his hoodie gasping for air “ god , sorry kid a rusty stop” Dave laughed awkwardly as they turned down some music  `music?` Tommy hated music , it reminded him of bad things , since when did Dave put on music anyways?  ` are you fucking shitting me?` A slight annoyed expression was visible on his face as he clenched the grey blanket he pulled it closer towards him as the door opened next to him “ c’mon mate, we gotta go “ Daves hand reached toward the blanket in an attempt to take it away ,Tom shook his head , and opened the other door “ i can do it myself” he growled as he dragged one of the bags , he pushed the blanket inside of the bag  ` you cant lose it if its in a. Bag` Tommy smiled to himself , his smile was quickly wiped off of him as he was pushed towards the door with another bag , he flinched as a car door was slammed closed “ shit” he laughed “ no escape now” Tommy smiled crookedly towards Dave “ nope, “ Dave hummed ,  that tune its so ... familiar? Tommy shook his head as he stepped away from the door step , Dave pressed the small door bell as soft ring was heard from the other side  ` don’t freak out don’t freak out` Tom thought to himself he grasped at his Hoodies collar , taking deep breaths “ it’ll be okay , they’re probably nicer than the last ones “ Dave turned to The now panicking child , “ thats what you said last time, “ Tommy replied he let go off his Hoodie trying to relax “ hello! , welcome , you are? “ the door was swung open as he saw a tall blond man in front of him , the man had a white and green hat with  sanddles?  Gosh it was almost snowing out here how could the man wear sandals? The man was extremely tall , he had welcomed in the social worker , “ hello , my names Philza craft , but call me Phill you must be the social worker? and you are?-“ a board was handed to him with all of Tommys information , Tommy felt uncomfortable as the man silently moved his lips mouthing the text but no words came out. “Yes , Thomas right?” Tom looked up slightly annoyed pointing out the red letters that spelt  T O M M Y , was the man blind? Tommy was clearly his name he couldn’t stand Thomas “ Tommy” Tom replied he tapped his fingers on his thighs , a stuttered breath came out of him as he tried to step back “ all right tommy! , you’re room isn’t done yet , so you can either sleep on the couch or somewhere comftarble , my names Philza feel free to call me Phil “ Phils eyes landed on the bags in the hands of Tom “ let me take those” Tommy dropped the bag reaching out to the grey blanket quickly pulling it out of the pile “ ye-yes”his eyes reflected slightly in the bright light behind Phil. “ okay come in? “ the tall man easily lifted up the bags as he walked inside of the house ,he kicked his shoes off before followinghim “ since its night , your new brothers wont be here to see you “ Tommy flinched as Dave slid towards him “ thats not a problem” i don’t want to meet them anyways he didn’t add “ Tomster? Dont bite them alright? , your medication take them and be good” Dave laughed as he kneeled in front of Tommy “ this household is the best where found so far “ Dave smiled and Tommy felt guilty “ sure sure, you always say that” Tom rolled his eyes to soften the situation he followed it with a few laughs , Dave nodded and stepped up sliding towards Philza“ alright ill be going now “Dave saluted Tommy before walking towards the door “ o7 mate “ he laughed at Dave replying with a “ pog champ” before the door was closed “ so....?” Phill dropped one of the bags from the counter next to the sofa “ i think those are your clothes? , and this is all your stuf “ Philza smiled “ any rules? , “ Tommy asked all his previous houses had rules “ what rules? , i mean kind of just to usual “ Philza laughed nervously , Tommy tilted his head but nodded “ okay so i sleep on the couch? “ “yep “ Phil replied “ all right “ Tommy hanged over the couch , he dropped the grey blanket onto the couch as he rolled over it “ hey calm down, i don’t want you getting hurt” He heard Phill screaming from the kitchen  `shit shit shit shit Shi-`  Tommy hadn’t noticed that he curled himself into he blankets , he forced his face into the corner of the couch  ` no no no , please no` he panicked , they’ll get here any minute and beat him to death wont they?? , he heard footsteps down the hallway “ please no-“ Tommy flinched as a hand glided over his back he quickly turned around eyes filled with tears “ shit - kid are you okay? , do you need anything?” Tommy was confused why didn’t he hit him? That’s what all the houses did , hit him if he cried did something wrong , or just because it pleased them “ what? “ Tom sniffled as his hand wiped the snot from his nose , “ why aren’t you hitting me? “ was he fooling Him ? trying to gain his trust to later break it “ what , hit you ? Are you crazy “ Phils eyes widened as he pushed away from the sofa“ hey , just get some sleep , ill be awake in the room thru that door “ Phill pointed towards a slightly red brown door with a blue carpet infront of it “ there , please come to me if something happens “ Phils eyes showed sorrow but Tommy shook his head  `hell jsut beat him , just call tubbo he would know what to do ` “ ye-yes , sir “ Tom replied he clenched the blanket on top of I’m “ alright...” Phils voice cracked as he looked confused , he saw Phil walk over to the door giving a thumbs up to Tommy before flicking off the main light and disappearing “ fuck...” ` TUBBO SHIT YES! ` Tommy hurriedly reached to his bag fishing out his phone “ yes!, “  4 missed calls from tubbee  he laughed silently as he sent a message. 

————————————-

Missed call from tubbee

Missed call from tubbee

Tubbee : Tommy?

Missed call from tubbee

Tubbe : Did you arrive yet?

Missed call from tubbee

Tommy : yes tub , I arrived lol why are you so clingy?

Tommy : the people here are weird

Tubbee is typing ...

————————————-  


Tommy sighed as he rested his phone on his chest , he focused on his breathing ,in out and in again and continue he never really did his breathing practices but he had to focus he flinched as he lifted his phone 

————————————-

Tubbee : why are they weir ? What hapend are you okay whats it like there?

Tommy : I’m okay mate , they just aren’t much like the difrent households but they’re probably trying to build trust or sum idk they’re terrifying there are also two other children

Tubbee : welll the other kids seem nice i think? I dont know its lonely here in the foser hom no ones realy here

Tommy : idk , the leader here is Phil or something he seems nice so far

Tubbee : wow sounds like an adventure , well want to call?

————————————-

Without replying Tommy pressed the small button on the top corner of his screen , imeadietly Toby picked up “ TOMMMY!!!” He flinched making a slight error sounding like sound “ are you okay? Did i scare you “ he relaxed when he heard Tubbos laughs at the end “ I’m fine , how are you?” Tommy grabbed his hoodies string pulling them slightly , his hands hurt as he dug his nails into his palms “ I’m good , just you know lonely without you “ Tubbo was Tommys best friend they met at a foster house once and imeadietly hit it off , just like that “ sure , aren’t there any more children there? “ Tommy laughed as he slid under the blankets , with they’re shared trauma they had no problem venting with each other they where attached to the hip , A bummer they where separated “ well yes but she’s just an infant , and annoying god i cant even explain how mu-“ he was cut off with loud cries “ shhhhhh “ Tommy heard as a thud followed , Tubbo dropped his phone probably off to care for the baby “ god he is annoying “ Tommy laughed , he felt glad when he heard the cries of the baby calm down and soft giggles from tubbo “ see i told you “ Tommy tapped the screen seeing Tubbo smile in front of the camera , “ gosh you look like a mess “ “ same to you “ Tubbo replied “ when was the las-“ Tommy was cut off as a door was slammed open on Tubbos side and he heard screaming “ i gotta go , see you tomorrow “ Tubbo screamed 

————————————

tubbee ended the call 

Lasted 34 minutes 

Tommy : tubbo you okay?

Tommy : tubbo ? Hello hey are you okay??

Tommy : Toby???

Seen 11:14 

————————————-

Shit did Toby get kidnapped or something? , Tommy laughed knowing exactly what happend his friend but he didn’t try to think about it , he quietly sobbed as he completely slid under the blanket , Tears filled his eyes silent sniffles left him he flinched as he screwed his eyes shut hearing a door open “ Tommy? “ a quiet whisper sound from the hallway , the bright light was flicked on “Tommy?” Tommy ignored it as he buried his head into the blanket “ thank god he asleep “ he heard Phil say he felt the ground twist under him , nausea bubbled up in his chest the light was flicked off again as he heard a door shut , Tommy looked behind him ,  `nothing` he thought to himself he lifted himself up silently stepping of the couch , he stopped in his tracks as the floor boards creaked Tommy ignored them and moved to the closest window his hand clawed at the bottom of the Window trying to pry it open  ` please please please just open` he whimperd his eyes slightly tearing but he wiped them away“ dont cry now “ he muttered as he prayed open the window , he screamed internally at the loud sound of the window opening  ` shit shit shit` he was movementless but nothing was heard a slight sigh of relief came from him as he poked his head out of the window “ not much of a fall , might be a trouble to get up again “ he laughed as he leaned more out of the window a cold breeze ruffled his hair , he loved it he felt free , happy , safe he leaned back rocking back and forth in his feet , eventually he stepped one foot out of the window hanging it outside of the window quickly he added his other foot and with out thinking he jumped “ SHIT “ he screamed as his hands where pulled upwards instead of him falling down “ whate fuck are you doing ? “ a tall man lifted him up from his wrists “ LET ME GO FUCKER “ Tom screamed squirming around his wrist felt like they where about to pop out of place , or even break “ shush before you wake them up “ he was dragged back inside “ whate hell “ Tommy was dropped to the ground as he quickly rubber his wrists , they where red with hand marks “ you where about to break your feet falling down there “ no way , i could have made it not that far jumped down farther than that “ The man laughed by now Tommys eyes adjusted to the dark seeing a towering brunette man with dark brown eyes ,  a am i gonna get beaten? , yes He whimpered as he saw the mans hand reach towards him Tommy shielded himself “ woah , just trying to lift you up “ indeed Tom was lifted upwards and dropped onto the couch “ now fucking sleep what is it? Must be around 1 AM dipshit get to snoring “ the man laughed as he shut the window  `so close` Tommy thought to himself a slight groan was heard from the man as he stepped into the hallway hearing a door shut filled him with relief instead of budging he felt that the man was still in the hallway “ I’m not dumb you know?” A slight laugh was heard before he heard a door open and shut again . 

To say Tommy was getting slightly tired , not much he just closed his eyes and slipped into a Realm of Dream and nightmares.


	2. Chapter 2 , not real people

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I know... this is fucking stupid and i haate it but i need filler :] so like here have what Tom dreamed about that night , and him waking up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tom wakes up ... well he doesnt but “wakes up” in a unknown place where he meets a “friend”

Tom opened his eyes , a light figure flashing before him   
“HEY STOP!” He screamed automatically , he didn’t want them to come towards him yet he screamed out to them.  
He ran after them , suddenly noticing the forest they where running thru , he felt a hand slam on his shoulder and was followed with pain  
“FUCK!” He screamed falling onto the ground , his face met the mossy rock ground  
“Hello Tommy , again! I didn’t see you there” the figure said in a playful tone  
“No , you fucking hit me!” Tommy smacked a invisible hand away from him turning around  
“What? , i did I’m terribly sorry” the figure pulled they’re hand out   
Tommy without thinking tooit he hand , he felt himself being pulled up but dropped to the ground again  
“You mother fucker! , why would you do that?” He screamed rubbing his back  
“Well you see , it feeds me” the figure said pulling at a mask that was covering they’re face  
“Fuck off Dream , go flirt with George or something” Tommy groaned to the non existent person  
“Well you see i would-“ Dream grabbed Tommy by the collar of they’re shirt “but I’m kind of hungry” they smilled behind the mask  
“Fuck off” Tom growled  
“Well why? , I’m the only one that doesn’t hit you every opportunity they get?”  
“That’s not true , And you know it” Tommy pushed the man , he laughed seeing it kind of startled the man  
“Why? You’re new family doesn’t like you? , do you think i don’t know?”  
“Dream , just do whatever night mare stuf you always do , or wake me up” Tommy said stepping backwards ready to run if he had to  
“No no , Tommy I’m you’re friend? Why would i?”  
“Because you always do Dream! Thats literally the only thing you do”  
“Ouch Tommy , that hurt” Dreams mask expressed sadness  
“I... I’m sorry Dream i didn’t mean to , you know” Tommy stepped forwards wrapping they’re arms around the ghostly figure  
“That’s right , you should be sorry hurting your only friend like that”  
“I’m so sorry Dream , so so sorry” Tommy cried grasping into the sweater of Dream  
“Its okay , sh sh now you have to wake up for e alright?”  
“Okay Dream...” Tommy screw his eyes closed knowing what would happen.

A sharp pain shot thru his body as what he thought was waking up , but he couldn’t move , he tried screaming and wriggled his fingers trying desperately to get lose from a unknown grip  
“Tommy... why did you hurt me?” A black figure stood in the hallway a white liquid spilled from they’re eyes,  
“You’re such a bitch Tom!” A woman screamed from behind the kitchen running towards him , he got ready for a hit but mid running the woman disapeared  
Tommy could feel Tears prick his eyes but the relief of crying never came,  
`please , i just want to wake up`he thought  
“TOM STOP CRYING YOUR A MAN! , DONT BE SUCH A PUSSY!” A man screamed from the hallway,  
Tommy tried screwing his eyes shut ... which seemed to work  
He opened his eyes to a long black figure hovering over him , with string thin arms , and a completely black silhouette , Tom screamed 

Waking him up from wherever he was

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please please this is the most stupidest chapter I’ve written in my whole life but i need filler so  
> Also!
> 
> REMINDER REMINDER , DRINK , EAT , MEDICINE AND OTHER IMPORTANT STUFF! Feel loved :] if you need help seek it! , it might make you feel better!

**Author's Note:**

> Hello and uhhhh.... *clapping noises* You made it to the end ALIVE 
> 
> Uhhhmmmm.... its dark outside??? I should go to sleep
> 
> REMINDER REMINDER!!!!: drink water! Eat food ! Take your medication feel loved and sleep enough! I hope you listen if you have problems with this :) love from someone on the internet you probaly dont care about but still <3


End file.
